Happy St. Andrew's Day! Here's Scotland most lovable comedian (no, not Frankie Boyle) Danny Bhoy, telling a Candaian audience at the Just For Laughs Comedy Festival how Scotland (maybe) came to have the Thistle as it's national emblem.

Lovely song about the 1980's to the tune of 'We didn't start the fire' by Billy Joel. The fashions from that era are back, so here's a look at what popular culture really was like back then. Oh the nostalgia. Enjoy.

Very personal routine from Dave Allen in 1984. Anyone who has given up anything will recognise the agony. And remember, if you smoke after making love, you're doing it too fast.

Cathering Tate's most famous character Lauren, (Am I Bovvered?) takes up cheerleading. Take the shame!

Yes, you can see how Kryten's story seems just the tiniest bit implausible... Red Dwarf's Robert Llewellyn dons his rubber face mask in the name of comedy.

Don't normally put clip as long as this, but if you have a bit of time to kill at lunchtime it's definately worth a look. Demitri Martin tells jokes while strumming away at his guitar and someone has added pictures from Google Images to add to the comic effect. Ridiculously random, but hey.

Jon Culshaw takes his comedy impression of favourite Doctor Who actor Tom Baker to a speed dating night. Funny fly-on-the-wall comedy short from BBC impressions show 'Dead Ringers'. As if single girls didn't have it tough enough...

Terror of The Ming-Mongs. A prize-winning edition of Victoria Wood's 1980s sketch series, containing her short but witty Dr. Who spoof, with Jim Broadbent (Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, Bridget Jones' Diary, Moulin Rouge) as the Doctor. His penalty for failing to beat the deadly Crayola is to have his mega plumfinity converted into negative cretathorgs. Gracious.

Comedy god Michael McIntyre makes Jonothan Ross' show funny. No mean feat. Who do you think is sexier: Michael McIntyre or Gerard Butler?

You wouldn't want to have these two on your side when planning an escape. More RAF fun from Armstrong and Miller.

A compilation of clips by ITN (Independant Television News) showing that crime definately doesn't pay.

After the huge success of 'American Idiot' Green Day have come back with a storming new album '21st Century Breakdown'. This is the 'Walking Contradiction' video from their 1995 album 'Insomniac'. It's an oldie but goodie - check out how young they all look! I put this up in celebration of their ongoing tour, and as this is a comedy website, I picked what I think is the funniest of their videos. It kind of reminds me of the Blues Brothers, leaving chaos in their wake. I particularly like Billy Joe Armstrong's ill advised beard. For details of their tour and other Green Day related matters go to the band's website at Greenday.com

Sing along below!

Do as I say not as I do because
The shit so deep you can't run away
I beg to differ on the contrary
I agree with every word that you say
Talk is cheap and lies are expensive
My wallet's fat and so is my head
Hit and run and then I'll hit you again
I'm a smartass but I'm playing dumb

Standards set and broken all the time
Control the chaos behind a gun
Call it as I see it even if
I was born deaf, blind and dumb
Losers winning big on the lottery
Rehab rejects still sniffing glue
Constant refutation with myself
I'm victim of a catch 22

I have no belief
But I believe I'm a walking contradiction
And I ain't got no right

Do as I say not as I do because
The shit so deep you can't run away
I beg to differ on the contrary
I agree with every word that you say
Talk is cheap and lies are expensive
My wallet's fat and so is my head
Hit and run and then I'll hit you again
I'm a smartass but I'm playing dumb

I have no belief
But I believe I'm a walking contradiction
And I ain't got no right

I have no belief
But I believe I'm a walking contradiction
And I ain't got no right

Monica goes down to the beach with Joey and Chandler and they return with a terrible secret about what happened there. The other friends prize it out of them though. Really brilliant over-acting for comic effect.

This is the best game of Simon Says I've ever seen. Absolutely fantastic. Can you guess who wins?

Now, it's not often I feel sorry for the police, but on this occasion...This guy's been pulled in for drunk and disorderly or something and all I can say is, he's gonna have a sore head in the morning, and not just from the booze.

A very topical song from the Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre, filmed during one of their performances at this year's Edinburgh Fringe Festival. Helpully, as the sound quality isn't what it could be, the lyrics are displayed for you. Also, for anyone who has not been to the Edinburgh Festival, it is the biggest arts festival in the world, so visitors routinely go to two or more one-hour performances a day in the preview week. And even in Edinburgh, the rooms can get very hot indeed, so it can all feel like a breeding ground for germs...Enjoy.

A wonderful song from the comic genious of Victoria Wood. I've heard rumours that she's going to be doing an updated version of this song on her Christmas special this year. This version is from 'An Audience With Victoria Wood' from 1988. Below are the lyrics for you to sing along.






Things Would Never Have Worked

It's over, we've missed the bus
Nice idea, but not for us,
We didn't click,
Let's make it quick and say goodbye,
Don't hold my hand, and don't demand a reason why
No loving looks, no fond regards,
Tonight was always on the cards.

I like big muscles, you were thin and lanky,
I like nice manners, you were far too cranky,
You blew your nose and then looked in your hanky,
Things would never have worked.

The day I met you was a real heart-wrencher,
I thought that love would be a big adventure,
Then saw the spinach on your bottom dencher,
Things would never have worked.

I wanted champagne and oysters,
'Cause that's the way I am,
You gave me Vimto, tinned carrots and Spam.

Rappot's a thing you just can't manufacture,
You had your pin-up girl, I couldn't match her,
I didn't want to, it was Mrs. Thatcher,
Things would never have worked.

I wanted love to come and knock our blocks off,
But even Venus takes her card and clocks off,
Your idea of foreplay was to take your socks off,
Things would never have worked.

I wanted moonlight and roses and all that silly tosh,
You wanted gerbils, a whippet, a wash.

I wanted love poems but you couldn't write them,
My earlobes nibbled but you wouldn't bite them,
You'd only fart and then, attempt to light them,
Things would never have worked.

We're not compatible, let's not get blue dear,
At least we see each other's point of view dear,
I like big hunky men and so do you dear,
Things would never have worked.

Do you know? Alan Davies thinks he does, but, as ever, Stephen Fry proves him wrong.

I've had some pretty terrible jobs in my time, but this has to beat them all. Lee Mack shines in this clip from the BBC series 'Not Going Out'

Funny little sketch from this Aussie sketch show. Beware next time you go into your local coffee shop...

Hope you had a fantastic Halloween weekend. Here's some more costume fun from the Big Bang Theory team. Can you guess what Sheldon's costume is?